A Little Sunshine

Daffodils, a little flower of sunshine.

Daffodils, a little flower of sunshine.

I willingly took six little tiny Vitamin D pills today, instead of the usual two. Why? Because I needed a little sunshine in my life. Before I  did that, I prayed for patience and grace. Why? Because it’s 7:30 in the morning and I already know it’s going to be a particularly trying day.

My mom has a CT scan of her abdomen today,  which is not her first turn around this merry-go-round. Her last one was about 6 months ago. That time nothing showed up, and this time we’ll see. But, it’s not the taking her to the test itself that has me praying for patience and taking sunshine in a bottle. It’s the way the last 12 hours have transpired in my household.

Because my mom has had a reaction to iodine in the past, whenever she has any type of test that has to do with contrast – which is what they’ll do in this CT scan -, there is a specific set of steroids and benadryll she has to take to prevent a reaction, this is coupled with the usual barium berry cocktail, no food after midnight and clear liquid diet that should produce the best pictures possible of her digestive tract.

What the doctors and concoctors of this process haven’t figured into the equation is that to tell someone like my mom that she can’t eat is a surefire way to cause the opposite reaction. Newton said, “For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.”  This is so true on so many levels, and in my household whenever my mom has some kind of test where she has to fast, there’s no surefire way to get her to not fast than if I tell her to fast.

I forget this reality every time. So much so, that I feel like slapping my forehead and shaking my head every time it happens. Not only because if I hadn’t said anything, she wouldn’t have bothered to make sure she ate, but also because it’s always in the middle of the night at about every hour and half intervals that she has a little something. Since the kitchen is right near my room  - actually the house is so small every room is right near my room – I get woken up every-time she has a little something. And woe to me if I come out and say anything to her about it. I might as well go into the bear’s lair, because once she’s made up her mind about something there’s no turning back, even if, as in this case, the instructions are written down in black and white.

So, no sleep gets added to my list of things to deal with today, and Newton’s words take on another meaning entirely too. They may cause my mom to eat when she’s not supposed to, but they can also apply to me when I meet the bear protecting her right to eat when and what she wants to in the middle of the night. I automatically want to respond with an equal and opposite reaction , which isn’t really patient, graceful or loving in any way.

I’m hoping by recognizing this, keeping my eyes focused on the Lord and, yes, taking a little more Vitamin D, that today I can just zip my lip and buck Newton’s Law because that may put a little more sunshine in my life.



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